Church Night

I cannot believe it is only day two of my new blog and i already almost bailed out…tomorow….i was saying to myself…i’ll write tomorrow. well, tomorrow is an old beggar, a whore. you want to help but the cup is empty. i once wrote an essay on emily dickinson “the whore” and i used some bs about how she revered love rather than god and that the definition of whore was blah blah blah something about honoring false idols and blah blah blah love was a false idol. how the hell did i even pose that argument (?), which i did and actually went up against someone in a debate. talking my way out of nonsense. that is crazy. what IS god if not love? whatever. don’t ask me to talk about jesus – though i’ll throw that name around as much as possible. i like to say it in spanish. heysoos! and you? i recently purchased jesus band-aids. they were there next to the bacon strip band-aids and the little black pussy cats. i wanted to cover a scratched knee with one but wondered what that might infer about my little one. an obama hat. a jesus cut. it just doesn’t seem right having our kids run around plastered with our political views. but then, i guess they ARE even without us thinking about it…i mean, how many Gap shirts have you bought this year?
let’s see…i really don’t mean to be smart about any of that stuff and i love the gap by the way. at least, before the items are washed. oops. i was just thinking. without pausing. (my reckless story). abandoning reason. hope.
i was wondering what happened to Fall? It rained like February two weeks ago and that was that. I gave up watering the second the first rain drop fell. and then, there were no more. now all my flowers are dead and i cannot believe i could be that lazy that fast – at the very first chance i had. save me says the withering blossom. hello?

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